Sunday, March 4, 2012

A narcissist or a cat?

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What do you think about love? No, no! Not another boring Juliette & Romeo's romance... not that kind of love! But the kind where you love yourself more than anyone in your life... The kind where you love how the other person loves you and where you love yourself through the other person's feelings to you.

Of course, loving oneself is something very essential; otherwise, one can never succeed in relationships and life and won't be able to love someone else and be loved. But... heard it or lived it, some people can love themselves even more than their families, their girlfriends and their wives. They tend to show that they are in love, and they actually are, but in fact, they are not in love with their partners but with themselves! They tend to choose or do the things that comfort them and bring them happiness, as they are the center of everything, trying to forget what might be of an interest to the close people around them too. They put themselves first. They don’t bother to understand the other person's feelings, perspectives or needs as they have no interest in meeting them. They are not easy to spot; you have to be in a serious friendship or relationship with them to figure them out. They would do anything to make things work out in a way that favors them.

Another type of self loving is when someone is in a relationship, and all what matters to him is how his partner loves him. What's the added value of his partner's love to his life and well being? These kinds of people like to get their own way, so they flirt as much as they can until their partner buys or gives them everything they want, material or not. "I love the way you love me", "I love how you take care of me", "I love the deserts you make me", "I love the beautiful jewelries you buy me",  "I love the fabulous vacations you book me", "I love how you talk to your friends about me", me me me me me!!!! Have you ever been in a relationship where your lover was using you to feel important? To reach his self esteem? Or to get the gifts and expensive things you buy and offer? How long did it take to be clear to you that he does not love you! He does not love how you are, but he loves the way you make him feel about himself, the importance you give him and the fact that you are ready to give him anything he wants. Of course, generosity is essential in a relationship, but when the relationship and love are based on what the other is offering - again, material or not- , then be sure that the day you stop buying your lady the expensive gifts or cooking your man the delicious dishes, or giving the most passion of all to your lover, that love will be over and your lover will be waving you good bye at the door step instead of being ready to give passion back to you!

A funny comparison between these types of lovers and cats, if you watch the behaviors of your cat - if you own one or if someone you know does- , you will feel in its character and behaviors a bit of what I mentioned above. But the good side of cats is that cats can ignore their owners sometimes but at least when they do they won't say they didn't :)

See you soon...


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